How to Call in Sick When You Just need the Day Off

Everyone needs the occasional unscheduled day of leisure. Here is how to get yours without raising suspicions at work

Steps

1. Find a quiet place for the phone call.
2. Call your boss.
3. Keep the excuse short and to the point.
4. Get off the phone as quickly as possible.

• If you can, call your boss's voice mail or send him an email rather than speaking with him or her directly. This avoids the possibility of questions and awkward advice that often trips up the caller.
• A good modern way (providing your boss is not harsh) is to pre-write an SMS the night before. You can then wake up in the morning, send the SMS, then go straight back to sleep! This looks like you've made the effort to get up early (or been up all night vomiting!) and reduces the amount of "up time" if you're after a good sleep in!
• When making the phone call, if you can do it early in the morning, when your voice is still rough with sleep, that will give added credibility.
• For an added effect, bend over your toilet while pressing your forearm into your stomach so you begin to sound like your stomach is really being affected by whatever you are calling about. (Usually this would make you sound like you just finished vomiting.)
• Another added effect is to take in a bit of water through your nose. Put your nose under a running faucet and take a shallow breath through your nose. It's uncomfortable for a short period but effectively gives you the sniffles for 2-3 minutes. This is long enough for you to make a convincing call to your boss and then proceed with your day off.
• If you're outside the house, calling from your car might be the quietest place you can manage.
• It's a good idea to mention in passing how you are feeling a little sick the day before and feeling better when you return to work.
• Keep an eye out for other people who have been sick at work and use the 'I must have gotten it from Jim in Accounting.' excuse.
• If you want to get multiple days off, pick a good illness: a migraine or a bad case of gastro can get you off for two or more days, as they can carry on for a long time and pop up at any time. Research the illness if you're very dedicated to avoiding work. Ask friends for the symptoms of the bad (real) illnesses they've had over time.

• "Morning. I'm not going to be in today. I was up all last night sick. I think we left the chicken out too long."
• "I won't be in today, I am not feeling well."
• "I've spent the last 24 hours either in bed or in the bathroom. I don't think I should go to work today."
• "I have jury duty, I will call in if I am dismissed." (It's advised to first check your company policy regarding jury duty. Some companies require a copy of summons to make a legit claim of jury duty.)

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1. Analyze the question carefully.
   Do your research and make sure you have a complete understanding of both points. You will benefit from the research when you come to write your essay and can easily compare similar aspects.
2. Write the introduction
   Start with a general point which establishes the similarity between the two subjects then move to the specific (exact) focus of the essay. The reader must understand which points you will be examining and which points you will not be examining within the comparison. At the end of the introduction, declare your preference or describe the significance of the two subjects.
3. Organize the sequence of paragraphs in the main body of your essay.
   Once you have defined the comparison and the basis of the argument you must determine the structure of your essay. It can be any of the following, but not a combination.
   
   Method 1
   
   You can discuss each half of the comparison in every paragraph. For example, begin with a paragraph comparing the two situations; each paragraph thereafter should compare a single aspect of both situations until you have completed comparing all the various points. The advantage of this structure is it continually keeps the comparison in the mind of the reader, as well as forces you to pay equal attention to each side of the argument.
   
   EG: Oranges & Apples
   
   Para 1 Color of Oranges/Color of Apples
   Para 2 Vitamins found in Oranges/Vitamins found in Apples
   Para 3 Health benefits of Oranges/Health benefits of Apples
   
   And so on
   
   Method 2
   
   You can alternate between the two subjects paragraph by paragraph. That is, the first paragraph of the main body of your essay begins with one side of the argument. The next paragraph deals with the other, and so on. You keep repeating this process looking at another point in the comparison until you reach your conclusion. This method allows you to discuss points in greater detail, but be sure to keep alternating and ensure you continue discussing similar aspects of each argument.
   
   EG: Oranges & Apples
   
   Para 1 Color of Oranges
   Para 2 Color of Apples
   Para 3 Vitamins found in Oranges
   Para 4 Vitamins found in Apples
   Para 5 Health benefits of Oranges
   Para 6 Health benefits of Apples
   
   And so on
   
   Method 3
   
   In the first half of the main body of the essay, you can argue one side of the comparison throughout as many paragraphs as you wish. When you have finished with that side of the comparison, switch and discuss the other side of the comparison. This method is by far the most dangerous, as your comparison can become one sided, without giving equal time to both. The other problem with this is that you may discuss different features in the second half than you did in the first half. If this occurs, the comparison falls apart as you are not comparing the same features of the two arguments.
   
   EG: Oranges & Apples
   
   Para 1 Color of Oranges
   Para 2 Vitamins found in Oranges
   Para 3 Health benefits of Oranges
   Para 4 Color of Apples
   Para 5 Vitamins found in Apples
   Para 6 Health benefits of Apples
   
   And so on
4. Conclusion
   The conclusion should give a brief, general summary of the most important similarities and differences. It should end with a personal statement, an opinion and the GFS – Great Final Sentence!
   
   It should leave the reader feeling that all the different threads of the essay have been drawn together in a cohesive way; they have learnt something - and they must be certain this is the end – not look around for missing pages. When you have two radically different topics, it sometimes helps to point out one similarity they have before concluding. (i.e "Although _______ and _________ don't seem to have anything in common, in actuality, they both ________.)
5. Revise your essay
   If time is not an issue, the best way to revise your work is to leave it for a day. Go out, have a coffee, have a drink, have fun……forget about the essay until tomorrow.
   
   Once you settle down to revise, remember that the two most important things to do when revising are to find problems and to fix them. These should be done separately (i.e., go through and find all the problems you can without correcting them). Although it is tempting to do them at the same time, it is smarter to do them one by one – this ensures you have checked everything, and ultimately makes the job more efficient and quicker. Sound simple? Maybe....Essential? – definitely!If possible, find a friend to look over the essay, as he or she may find problems that you missed.

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1. Sit properly in a good chair designed for desk work. Your back should be straight, and your head should be looking directly into your monitor. If you have to look down or up, you need to adjust the height of either the screen or your chair.
2. Maintain an ergonomic body posture while typing. Keep your legs bent at the knees so that the knees are only slightly higher than your hips. Feet should be flat on the floor or on a step stool of some sort.
3. Stand up every half hour. Walk around a few steps, stretch your legs, and give your eyes a break from focusing on your computer screen.
4. Roll your head around your neck periodically. Do the motion slowly clockwise for 1-3 iterations and then repeat in the opposite direction.
5. Roll your wrists regularly (this will help prevent carpal tunnel syndrome if you spend a lot of time typing).
6. Contract your stomach and butt and hold it there for a few seconds, then release. Do this all day long as you are in your chair.
7. Stretch your arms, legs, neck and torso while sitting. This will help prevent you from feeling stiff.
8. Take advantage of the downtime created by rebooting or large file downloads to get up and try something more ambitious such as doing a few push ups, sit ups, and/or jumping jacks. Beware of your snickering co-workers though.
9. Acquire a hand gripper. They are cheap, small and light. When you have to read something either on the screen or on paper, you probably won't be using your hands very often so squeeze your gripper. It is an excellent forearm workout.
10. Acquire an elastic band (also cheap, small and light) and do the actions mentioned in step 5 with it (i.e. when stretching your arms, do it by pulling apart the elastic band). You will not only stretch but it will also work the muscles slightly.
11. Take a few deep breaths. If possible, get some fresh air in your lungs.

• As long as something is moving, you will be helping to keep yourself in better shape.
• Always have water nearby to drink.
• If you're all alone, try shutting off the computer for a bit and exercise. If you're on a phone call, get up and do stretches, or leg lifts, anything to keep moving during down time away from the desk.
• Try combining opposing muscle groups (flexors and extensors, e.g. biceps vs. triceps) to get a good workout. Clasp your hands together palms facing each other. Pull-up with one hand while pushing down with the other.

Last edited on Tue Oct 25th, 2005 10:26 am by outlandish

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1. Spray paint the stick that will be used for the scyth handle.
2. Cut the cardboard in the shape of a scyth blade.
3. Spray paint it and nail the blade on; use small nails and a hammer, or use tacks.
4. If the sheet is already in the color desired, there is no need to dye it. If not, dye the sheet the color that you have chosen to create a cloak, or cape for "Grim Reaper." Once that is done, move on to the next step.
5. Dress the child up in the dark apparel, including shoes and socks.
6. Put the skeleton mask on the child.
7. Use the (middle) edge of one side of the sheet, and place it over the child's head; once positioned just right, safety pin the cape from underneath the neck area...leaving it loose...and giving it a hooded look.
8. Poke, or punch, holes to (both the front and back of) the sheet (on each side of the waist area) for the rope to be pulled through, thus allowing free movement for the arms.
9. Cut the rope (in the length of a child's belt) and run it through the belt holes; then loop each end and make a knot on each of the ends (pull each end tight) and wrap around the child's waist. It will hold the cloak or cape in place.
10. Have the child get into the character by getting a Scyth and a "Trick or Treat" bag or container, and he or she is off to a fun Halloween evening, as "The Grim Reaper."

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1. Start and Carry: During this phase, you want the muscles of the right shoulder, arm and wrist to relax while simultaneously allowing easy running action. Begin with the right foot pushed forward. Heft the javelin above shoulders or head. Point the right elbow forward. Turn the right palm toward the sky, creating a natural platform for the javelin to rest. Aim the javelin in the direction you're going to run and keep the metal tip down just a bit.
2. Approach Run: After you've done this a while, the approach run can take 13 to 17 steps. The run-up is shorter for inexperienced throwers. Keep hips high and run on the balls of your feet. Let your free arm swing more across the body. Flex the arm carrying the javelin to fix its position.
3. Withdrawal: It's a good idea to use a checkmark to note where this phase starts, beginning with the right foot and lasting about two strides. It's important to make sure this movement doesn't harm your momentum. Upon reaching the checkmark, speed a little bit ahead of the javelin instead of pushing your shoulders and the javelin backward. Keep your head facing the way you're throwing. Keep your hips at right angles to the running direction. Shift your right leg forward and up to help keep hips in proper position.
4. Transition: Also known as the cross-over, this is where you achieve the javelin tosser's "lean-back" by putting your right foot ahead of the center of gravity. Keep the right foot close to the ground. Right heel touches ground. As the right foot moves forward, the left foot moves up and your trunk leans at a 115-degree angle backward. This phase is finished when the right foot's on the ground and the left leg is forward and elevated.
5. Pre-delivery Stride: The left leg moves forward and the shoulders and hips are aligned with the throwing direction. Wait for the left foot to touch ground. Straighten the torso. Turn face toward direction of the throw. Javelin and shoulders are parallel. Throwing hand above shoulder level.
6. Delivery: Once the left foot hits the ground, your left side must be ready to handle thrusting of the right leg, which drives up and forward and brings the hips into a right angle with the throw. After hip thrust, shoulders and chest turn forward and align with hips. Throwing arm elbow comes forward. Throwing shoulder moves over left leg. Left leg lifts and throwing arm moves, with the elbow high and close to the midline. The javelin release angle should account for aerodynamic lift and drag. Experts recommend 33 degrees as the optimum release angle.
7. Recovery: The left foot's on the ground. The right leg passes it and then stops you. How quickly you stop depends on how much momentum you built during the run-up. Usually, it can take as much as seven feet.

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